Wednesday April 7, 2004
This is the yellow/itch condition report. There will be fewer of these now, unless something unexpected occurs.
I went to my doc's office today to see what the tests from Monday had revealed. Short answer - my liver functions are improving. The expectation at the moment is that it may take several months for complete recovery.
Oh fucking joy. If you've detected an attitude, you got THAT right.
The long story will explain...
I was (and still am) fatigued, woozy, frustrated and worried about what my symptoms actually mean(t). Subjectively, I felt worse today than the previous two days, so when the assistant revealed simply that the tests showed 'some improvement' but no, they didn't really know what was causing my problem, and handed me bloodwork requisitions for 4 weeks of retesting as if I should be placated, I was certainly NOT.
The dissatisfaction was increased by my understanding that my doc would be out of the office for 2 weeks starting Friday. To add to my negative emotional state, the information described was eeked out with an attitude that I should already know these things and therefore not be worrying my little head about it. You know: let the doctor worry about the details.
I am used to and expect to continue being treated as an interested party in my health care, complete with disclosure and explanations as things are found/eliminated from the picture. So, I was pretty distressed by the end of my exchange with the assistant. And so exhausted that I was on the verge of tears.
She came back to tell me that the doc couldn't talk to me right then, but if I came back in a bit, she'd have time then. I explained to the assistant (and to the doctor when I did get to see her) that I didn't come there expecting to see her, just to get some information. I handed her my list of questions and we chatted.
First about the problems I was experiencing with her office over the past few weeks - not getting phone calls I was told to expect; not being told that Rx's were called in for me when it was questionable whether they would be. And then that, in combination with her anticipated absence, I didn't want to wait again and have no information, hence my unscheduled visit to get some answers. (One of the questions was: who do I consult and who would be checking on my blood tests while my doc is away? Not as simple as one would think, at least not for this particular office.)
We got through that and then I explained that I'd rather know exactly what was causing my liver problems then just being relieved that things seemed to be getting better and stop looking for information. I explained why - I have done some research: I do have herpes and the virus can be implicated in hepatitis, is not a simple thing to combat and can be fatal. We didn't even get into the big C that could be the cause.
It was not comforting to have my GP tell me she'd never heard of herpes affecting the liver. I have to think that if anyone was going to be seeing this, it would be a hepatologist, not my GP who has only had two other patients with hepatitis in her career.
In her opinion, the medications were probably the underlying factor, since I was improving now that I'd stopped everything. I countered that if there were other factors, the meds could possibly have been magnifying the effect, and that stopping the meds would provide some improvement without changing the root cause. And I also pointed out that for the past year she had been experimenting with my hormones and I didn't want to continue that approach to my health.
It was a long, but productive exchange. I am only slightly mollified that she did ask me to look into the herpes connection and let her know what I found out. If I hadn't been so tired, I may have remembered to take the following (from www.medscape.com) Herpes Simplex Type 2 Causing Fulminant Hepatic Failure But then again, I thought I was just going to get answers not provide them.
I am, according to my doctor a 'difficult patient'. Not a bad patient, just difficult. Why? Because I am usually one step ahead of them (her words) and because I come in with several complaints at once. I had continuously complained of fatigue, along with various other non-specific symptoms for the past 3 months but because I also discussed with her my neck and other issues it was difficult (for her) to figure out the main problems.
Not in her favour, but ignored for the time being, at this point, she said that vague tiredness and feeling like shit were sometimes emotionally induced. Don't go there with me - I have been improving immensely in that department and am still under mental health care.
I pointed out that the reason for my having more than one issue to discuss at an appointment was the fact that I cannot get in to see her when one particular problem is of concern - it takes weeks to get in and by then several may have come to mind or become more urgent. She conceded that the waiting time for an appointment has been a problem since she came back from leave in January.
I also told her that I had never been this ill for this long in my entire life. I didn't mention that I'd learned that I needed to be active in figuring out my own problems specifically because I have had many encounters with medical practitioners that have proven to be, in the least case, annoying and time wasting or, in the worst case, potentially life threatening.
I made no apologies for being informed and concerned and ill. We parted on good terms with an increased understanding of each other and the medical problems that are rampant in Ontario. No excuses, just acknowledging the reality that things are getting worse instead of better. (Oh, and she's only going to be away for a couple of days. Communications in her office really need some attention.)
I promised that when I get my neck sorted out (and this liver thing) she'd really hardly ever see me - honest. Whole years have gone by in my life where no doctoring was necessary. Well, if we forget all the ones that were necessary solely due to my femaleness - but that's another long long story.
I want to go there again and I plan to exceed the expectations of several months to recover by at least 2.
0) { ?>